Newcastle United slumped to yet another defeat at a sodden Anfield on Monday evening, with Jürgen Klopp's Liverpool running riot but somehow only winning by two goals.
A virtuoso performance by Martin Dúbravka helped Eddie Howe avoid a pulverising defeat with a haul of ten saves that included a fine penalty stop from Mo Salah in the first half.
The Slovakian did give away a contentious spot-kick himself in the 84th minute, though, after making slight contact with Diogo Jota, who elected to throw himself to the deck rather than roll the ball into an empty net.
Newcastle were somehow still in the game at that point thanks to their goalkeeper, but no outfield player will look back on this night with any fondness. We were battered and most in black and white were atrocious.
There's no way he deserved to concede four goals and a penalty, with a performance that brought to mind Tim Krul at White Hart Lane all those years ago. It wasn't like he was making routine stops, either, some of his saves were right out of the top drawer.
We've been keen to see Tino given a run in his preferred right-back position for ages, but he was shocking here. There were too many errors in his game to recount, but his decision to try and play offside against Gakpo for the third was a particular lowlight.
Although he was dragged down to the level of his colleagues by the end, Schär is probably next in line to Dúbravka for any credit that's due for this not being one of the most embarrassing defeats in recent memory. He did all he could to stem the tide in the first half.
Would have been slumming it with Tino in the 2s had it not been for his goal because he had a nightmare against Nuñez. In addition to giving away the penalty for a clumsy challenge on Diaz and a huge chance to Liverpool's number nine, he flubbed his lines countless times.
We haven't seen many displays from Burn where his attacking is better than his defending, but this was one of them. He was narrowly denied a fine goal by a correct offside decision and had a tough assignment against Salah but he was found wanting, just like last week.
The 17-year-old was again the pick of a bad bunch in central midfield, despite being the one hooked after Liverpool went 1-0 up. While he was far from the best we've seen of him, he was involved in most of our better attacking moves, as few and far between as they were.
Bruno's effort to win the second ball and then get back after failing to do so on Liverpool's opener was nothing short of disgraceful. That horror show aside he showed a couple of nice touches but his forward passing was infuriatingly poor and he only won a solitary tackle.
He earned himself a bonus point with the corner delivery for Botman's goal, but make no mistake about it he was as bad as Bruno here and probably worse. Completed just 68% of his passes, which for a central midfielder is a joke, and fell over at a crucial moment again.
This was a bizarre performance from the winger, who flitted from moments of real sharpness to periods where he looked incapable of running. Despite being very obviously shattered he lasted the 90, got a great assist for Isak, and looked like our most threatening forward.
He took his goal beautifully but he was barely a factor in the contest otherwise, with Konaté marshalling him with relative ease. Still, when your lone striker in a stinking team showing scores from the only chance created for him then it's hard to complain too much.
We're still not sure how he wasn't booked in the first half, but he rectified that in the second, as tends to be the way. Other than his indiscretions this wasn't a great showing from Big Joe, who didn't look remotely sharp and didn't test Alexander-Arnold enough defensively.
He had one opportunity to make a critical contribution in the 76th minute when dribbling into the Liverpool box and did what everyone expected him to; blasted the ball high into the Kop. Buzzed around busily otherwise, but there's nothing new there.
He seemed ready to be brought on to stem the tide after it went 3-1 and still came on regardless when Botman dragged us back to 3-2. His introduction saw us switch to a 5-4-1, which did us absolutely no favours and cost us the penalty for the fourth.
Isak was visibly desperate not to pass to him on a late counter that saw him lose the ball when attempting a return through pass, with Liverpool's subsequent counter leading to the fourth goal. There's something very odd about his whole situation at the club.
What a time to be playing the first Tyne-Wear Derby in almost a decade, eh?
It's a trip to the Stadium of Light for a third-round FA Cup tie with our beloved local rivals on Saturday in a 12.45 p.m. GMT kick-off that's to be shown live on ITV.
What we wouldn't give for another unlikely Derby Day hero to emerge. Howay the lads!
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